Anonymous asked: Would what you say to someone who has been down lately about having a difficult time finding his/her "other half?"
The best advice I gave myself when I was in your position was that I’d find whoever this mysterious “other half” was the moment I stopped looking for him. I dropped the entire notion of thinking whether or not “today was the day” I’d meet Mr. Right. What I found was that I lifted this immense burden that I had unconsciously put on myself, and I regained the confidence that I once lost over a love that had soured.
Then I told myself that I’m not supposed to EVER be looking for “another half”; that the next time I am in a relationship, I need to be able to present myself to him as a whole. Metaphorically speaking, I needed to be able to fill a cup with so much love that I could then dedicate the overflowing love for other people. Should the cup ever stop brimming with love, you will find yourself with the same void regardless of whether you are by yourself or with another person. The reality is that even if a person is in a relationship, if he/she lacks the understanding of putting his/her own heart as a priority, pain is inevitable. The void is filled with jealousy and other malicious thoughts that deteriorate the beauty of love in its purest form. Those who believe they need someone to complete themselves have a ton of work to do, because until they can love themselves fully, there is nothing to say that someone else can do the job better. This is not meant to offend anyone though, for I do believe that this journey to understanding how to love yourself is a lifelong feat. It’s really true that you have to “love yourself first.”
For me, ambition and confidence are not only of prime importance, but also highly attractive. I made it my goal to be able to write the next chapter of my life as a strong and complete individual. Work on yourself, exceed your potential, learn to love life as it is. I pushed myself to essentially eat well, exercise a lot, and laugh plenty with my friends.
Perhaps it was a coincidence, or maybe my advice worked — but I really found my boyfriend when I least expected it and when I least needed one, which made it just right.
